Dear Readers

I've decided to start a new blog; one where people know it's me writing, and not Blogger Girl. Yes, I'm aware we're the same person, but I feel more confident writing so that's why I've created a new blog- www.chloescreativespace.blogspot.com
If you like my writing start looking on my new site.


Blogger Girl

The Stress Of Being A Teenager

Being a teenager is hard. It's when you're expected to act like adults but sometimes still get treated like children. Not to mention the stress of doing GCSE's.




We've started our English Coursework. We have to write a 1,000 word essay on how the women in Macbeth are presented. I'm enjoying it for some strange reason. I've always liked studying Shakespeare and this coursework is challenging- which I find fun because it gives me something to accomplish. I'm aiming to get an A*, which is quite an ambition I know, but I'm going to do extra work over the weekend until I feel confident with it. So far, I've wrote about the three witches and how we first meet them, they are presented as quite evil. I'm going to write about Lady Macbeth next and how manipulating she is.


Music is something I find useful for when I'm writing. Tonight I have sorted out my playlist and I've downloaded quite a lot of songs. I'm not going to list them because there's way to many. In my Musical Music playlist there are over 80 songs, including songs from Les Miserables, Wicked, We Will Rock you, Hairspray and more musicals.


My older cousin, who I'm going to nickname Simba, because he was obsessed with The Lion King when he was a child, always told me to watch out when I reached Year 10 because it is the worst year for arguments and stress. I'm starting to believe him. My 'friends' are ignoring me again. It's got me wondering if I've done something wrong or if it's just me.


Quote of the day:

'Remind yourself it's okay not to be perfect'

-Blogger Girl

Closed Doors

Have you ever had someone close to you shut you out? Like, you're friends one day and the next they are keeping secrets from only you? Not any of their other friends; just you? Does it make you wonder what you did wrong? Or if there's something wrong with you? Does it make you feel unwanted, unloved? Kind of like they're closing the door right in your face?
This has happened to me before. Well, it does happen to me. I feel like nobody at school wants me around or trusts me enough to tell me things. One girl says I shouldn't take things so personal but I can't help it when everyone is making me feel worthless. Sometimes I wonder if they'd miss me if I suddenly stopped showing up to school. I've actually thought about not going to school sometimes. People have doubts all the time. It's a totally natural thing for humans to go through- but the amount of doubt I have worries me sometimes. I doubt everything I do because all I can think of is if people will judge me.
That's why I like this blog being anonymous. If people do judge me, they won't know my face to put that judgement to. I feel like I can write anything on here and be confident with clicking the publish button. I'm confident in myself when I'm Blogger Girl but not when I'm at school.


Quote of the day:

'Don't judge my choices without understanding my reasons'

-Blogger Girl

Therapy, Friendship and Secrets

When you go to a therapist, you can talk about whatever you want to a complete stranger and they listen to you and help you work through your problems. Writing this blog is like that. I can write whatever I like, control what we talk about and people are able to comment and help me or talk to me; people that are complete strangers.


I've always liked the idea of therapy, having someone to talk to and knowing they are not allowed to talk about anything you tell them. Having someone to confide in, like a best friend. Well, I do have best friends that I can tell anything to and I do tell them some things. I think secrets are what keeps friends closer. If someone tells you a secret, it obviously means they trust you enough to share something close to them. And that's the same if you tell them a secret.


What makes a good friend though? Someone you can have a few laughs with, text occasionally. I'm really picky with who I chose to be my friends. Sure, there is a lot of people who I get on with, I like to think I am an approachable person, but I only have three main people I consider friends. And that's okay. I don't mind not having many friends; having people to confide in is enough.


Quote of the day:

Everyone wants to be the sun to brighten up everyone's life, but why not be the moon, to brighten the darkest hour'

-Blogger Girl

Memories

How do you guys keep track of things that has happened in your life? Do you keep anything important? I know I do. I have a scrapbook of pictures of my family and friends. But I also have an old shoebox filled with things in it that are important to me. I'm going to make a list of what's in there because I like making lists.

• There's a Snow Globe with Tigger in it. My best friend from primary school bought me it for a birthday.
•  There's a rubber Flounder, from The Little Mermaid, in it, because The Little Mermaid was a big part of my childhood.
• There's a teddy bear with my name on the shirt she's wearing.
• There's two birthday badges- 13 and 15
• There's a lazar light that my Nan bought me.
• There's a One Direction Badge
• There's a Reading Activist badge because I volunteer at the library.
• There's the first letter of my name on a keychain.
• A charm bracelet with six charms: The Little Mermaid, Tinker Bell, a heart with the Great Britain flag on it, a teddy bear, the first letter of my name and a dolphin.
• There's a model of a baby sleeping with the sign 'a new baby' on it. It was bought for me when I was born.
• There's three coins because I like collecting coins: Two shillings, Half Penny and an ancient Greek Drachma.

I'm obviously going to add more things if I think they are important to go in there. Keeping memories is something I think is quite important; it's like you're keeping part of yourself stored away somewhere.


Quote of the day:

'We don't remember days, we remember moments'

-Blogger Girl

 

To My Future Self

To My Future Self,


When I look in a mirror right now, I see someone who isn't confident unless she's with friends and family. Someone who doesn't speak up in class, someone who doesn't speak to anybody outside of her friendship group. Someone who isn't comfortable talking to people outside her friendship group. A girl who only becomes herself when she reads and writes. Reading and writing is what keeps her sane and happy.


In a year from now, I want to be able to look in a mirror and see a confident girl who can speak up and be happy normally, without having to read or write. Not saying that I'm going to stop reading or writing- I never could- but I would be confident enough without having to write down everything I want to say.


Quote of the day:

'The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday'

-Blogger Girl